


Time

by dolceandlallana



Category: Football RPF, Sernavas, Spain NT - Fandom, sernando - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-10-30
Packaged: 2018-02-23 05:43:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2536307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dolceandlallana/pseuds/dolceandlallana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by Oscar Wilde, I wrote this fanfic from Fernando's point of view. I changed the title from 'Once Upon A Time' because of confusion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There was something out of the ordinary about our first encounterment. It feels as if every time I reflect back, I like to fondly reminicse about your deep voice.  
One awful thing I destest about myself is my manifestation with relapsing my memories, the good and the bad. My father told me that its how we learn and grow. But without a doubt, I always reflect back to the time our paths crossed. You were merely a blur when I first glanced in your direction, you made the atmosphere melt. I often lose sleep questioning God, to whom I have no faith in but your body ink indicates you do; to supply me with an answer as to how your presence makes me feel hostage in a world of freedom. I do apologise but fuck you, darling. I visted my father for who was wiser to discuss such a deep topic. He prescribed me time but time feels absent, on the pitch, in your company and in my mind. I sometimes believed the moon shined and the sun reflected light for you were the one feeding tragic into my pleeding heart, don't let me collapse. Your sharp sprints on the pitch made feel as if you were leaving manking but your beeming snears satisfiyed the world.  
Where am I even going with this? I've only rekindeled my gaze for a mere ten minutes. Looking back to our naïve days where adolesence was far from a bliss. Lost in love, lust and desperation. I nicknamed you Cuqui after I watched you bite into the soft cookie joking with the others in the dressing room.


	2. Subject to Tradegy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde

What I have always ever wanted has always ever been retained in my stiched up heart. I pityed my innocence and my inability to express the burning passions that have always been hoarded because of the twisted media.  
I always attempt to recall and follow something a wise man once said but that wise man is forever a fabrication so what was holding me back? My goal was metres away and I yet I couldn't shoot.  
I sighed heavily to the left all I wanted was harmony but you, Sergio Ramos erupted a civial war in my mind. Fustrated, I left the room. Yet the smell of your cologne lingered like a mist. I found my way out back on to the pitch where my career sprouted. I sat on the carpet of dreams of all the glory seeking adolescents in they academy. In the idyllic cerpuscular night under the bed of burning hopes I call stars I lay with my hands behind my head and glanced contemplating. I honestly had no idea what direction this was going. I smiled from ear-to-ear as I truely did feel rebelious.  
The doors from behind opened quitely, my smile rapidly faded I began to sit up almost automatically.  
It was the one, the one who would fill the void of the echoing companion my wife once half filled in my youth.  
"What is it that you want?" Our captain faced him with a restless wear to his chisseled face. "I need to confess something, but swear you won't tell another soul". His speech was rapid, one could argue that you could hear his heartbeat in the humid weather. "Okay, okay I swear." the captain didn't seem to give an ounce of fuck but felt obliged to. "I think i'm homo but actual homo" his breathing slowly retrieved to its ninty beats per minute. I felt my cheeks grow crimson, my smile widdened and I could physically feel the flames of passion being fuelled. The gods have been good to me, It thought. "Well okay I accept you man but who, who is this person exactly?" curiousity over towered his tone yet he tried to remain neutral. "Navas. Jesus Navas. The one with the beautiful eyes and sharp cheeck b...". Iker cut him short "yes, I know who you're referring to but isn't he a father just as you are?" Iker saw it as ideological but he was a leader, he was born to knock sense into the senseless.  
I felt life choke me with shock as my throat grew dry and tear ducts flood. The rest of the conversation was a blur for I was occupied with my own sorrow. My entire life has been the subject of misconception I want to argue my case - but life is unfair and maybe God has subjected me to face his wrath by inhaling the same air as you. Sergio had smashed my cardiac system to grains, but you mean the whole fucking world to me Sergio Ramos.  
I also thought myself as a keen observer of character so as I let the pitch drink up the last of my tears before using the back of my hand to soak up my woes. I couldn't allow someone to take away my purpose of living.  
As I walked back into the building, the maliacious words echoed in my ears I wanted to scream but i'm Fernando Torres and I conceal.


	3. Fight or Flight?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fernando finds that the grass may be greener on the other side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been fighting to be who I am all my life. What’s the point of being who I am, if I can’t have the person who was worth all the fighting for? - Stephanie Lennox.

I got a taxi to the hotel, I arrived late but I couldn't care. Besides impressions never last just like hopes fade and dreams end. Expectations will always rise and standards would always drop, that's life.   
I dedicate to march along the pitch you call holy because for ten minutes you have supplied me a reason to live. The corridor of the hotel was chocked of brightness and as it seemingly ended in darkness, room 54.  
I swiped the card and slowly entered but the rollercoaster ride of emtions was not coming to a stop just yet besides my cardiac system was smashed. No matter, I remain neutral as I pour my eyes like water over the fires of hell that is Jesus Navas. Ironic isn't it. I fucking hope so.  
He laid shirtless on the single bed parallel to mine. I judged him chronalogically from his coarse black hair to his precisley cut toe nails, and exhaled. He half opened his eyes at the sound of my exhale and rose. I rapidly made way to the bathroom before I could portray any signs of fustration. I washed my face and didn't dare look at my face for I was afraid, afraid of reaching the edge of hope. I pivoted to the towel and dryed my face as I remeber something my father told me a few christmas eves ago; "Always feign the feeling when pain was unbareable" but it maybe just what i'm doing now in fear that the petite man could skip into wonderland with my lover.   
My thoughts were disrupted by his slow knocking. My mind was telling me to respond but my heart felt bitter towards him.   
Eventually, I opened trying not to grunt. "Are you okay? You look sick." Jesus had empathy but the bastard was a living proof that I may not have chance but what has all dictators in history taught me? Manipulation.   
I smirked as I shoved past him to my crisp white bed. "I'm just really tired, Jesus". Making eye contact with Jesus felt as if he was searching into my soul, and absorbing my thoughts. I swiftly climbed into the sheets and turned to the wall. I could still feel his gaze burning like lasers on my back. I was still fully dressed in the stench of anxiety but it didn't make a difference. Disappointment and fustration had been embedded in me but I wont remain immobile.  
Jesus eventually turned the lights off and crawled into his bed. I swear to God, if he stared a minuted longer I would have choked the asthetic beauty out of his sorry soul.   
But he was clueless and maybe this was my advantage, I knew what he could never guess. Sergio's words were laced with poison but I held the limits to the trigger. I shut my weary eyes. I had tripped and fallen down the well of love.


	4. In Two Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fernandos in two minds about Jesus and his manifestation with Sergio.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection." - Leonardo Da Vinci.

My eye lids felt like weights on my face. I was woken by the heavy pounding of my heart against my ribcage, the rhymic beating resembled knuckles knocking on the door of an abonded house. I know theres no one to answer the door but I feel like i'm behind the door to all answers. I could feel deep breathing down the neck of my cold shoulder; I wasn't startled. I inhaled the revolting, stimulating yet powerful fragrance of what smelled like tears, if tears had a stench.  
I slowly turned towards the direction of the slow breathing on my shoulder.  
I saw Jesus, he was in complete harmony. I starred at his face that was inches away from mine, I wasn't able to spot any diminutive physical deformaties on his thick skin. My father once told me that there are a special selective group of individuals in this world; their capabilities limited to the breeding of envy, my father was repulsed by such individuals and so was I.  
His his arms around my waist, I was surprised as to how he hadn't fallen off the bed; he was literary on the edge.  
I sighed and looked at the ceiling as if i'm searching for a reason. It was peaceful.  
My alarm astounded me, Jesus rose.  
He look at me with half his eye shut, I looked back with a bored stare. He looked around the room probably for a reason. "I always sleep next to my son at night and, and i'm sorry". I elongated my glare. He stood up. Without thought, I reached out and grabbed his wrist. My thought process rendered listless as I searched for a reason for my action. "It's okay man, I know how you feel. We all get homesick". I sat up with my hand still around his wrist. I never missed my family, they were the superficial portrait for the generic world to admire. If I tried, I could care. But love, i'm not sure if that existed.  
Had you of fallen in love if love was not a label?  
Sergio made me question it.  
I let go of his wrist but he remined at my bed side starring at my torso. I noticed and mirrored his glance, I wasn't shirtless when I fell asleep. I looked up without moving my head. Jesus noticed and turned. I would enquire him but we were all liars and I accepted it. Lying pertained the art of thought.  
I saw Jesus as a waif, his company was comforting.  
Either way, nothing lasts ever.

I made sure I left the room before he could leave the bathroom, I didn't want to begin to imagine the aftermath.


	5. Merely Satisfied

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tables have turned for Fernando.

I strolled onto the training ground. The emanation of freshly cut grass grasped my attention. The gruelling army like drill and mild pornographic stretches were different today. Times like this remind me of my father and how at the tender age of seven I watched him ramble on about football, he was commited and passionate. He planted the seed of my career but never emotionally prepared me. I guess thats character building.   
I had my gaze fixed on one particular individual, Sergio Ramos.   
His hair reflected the sunlight, I would argue that he could turn a man blind. His beeming eyes would wrinkle at the corners when he'd smile ear-to-ear, how adorable. You could sharpen a knife with cheeck bones like his. He was beautiful, like a greek god. Unfortunately, I was Ophelia and he was Hamlet in this tradegy. But the past was dead just like Shakespeare and tomorrow has yet not been lived. I jogged up just behind him as I watched him and Pepe take turns reciting the lyrics to a generic spainsh song on the radio. There I realised how truly alone I was. Had I become an antagonist?  
Juan and I were mutal friends, we even roomed together but this year he requested for a room change. I didn't give a fuck, he was the only person I ever met that failed to generate their own vibe. There was nothing hellenic about him.

I panned the team as I slowed down, I realised I was not only alone in the team but in life. I don't know how long this gapping whole of misery had been inside of me. I stopped as I felt life suffocate me. My tear ducts were river banks on the brink of bursting. I bent over and clenched my icy chest as I dropped my jaw gasping for air. My vision blurred as all I could see was the remainder of the team continue to run. One blur ran back placing his hand on my shoulder. There was an absence of moisture in my throat, am I dying? 

My eyes felt like they were bearing the burdens of my sins. I opened them with force to a white ceiling. I shut them abruptly, I didn't have the energy to deal with reality. The hospital bed had stiffened my body, I tried to adjust my posture and failed."How you feeling?" it was Jesus' voice. The words were music to my ears, how words were truly alive on the tongue. I wanted to make a sarcastic remark but I was in no position to give up on the one person who gave an ounce of fuck. I opened my mouth to answer, but I was cut short. "He's so fragile". Was that Sergio? Is Sergio here? I couldn't deal with any emotions so I began the silent treatment, it worked with Nora and Leo. Besides it was crystal clear to me why Sergio was here so why bother taking a ride on the disappointment deternator?  
I could feel Jesus' smooth fingers glide across my dry hand. His touch sent shivers down my spine. I felt like a waif.   
"It's getting late, i'm heading to my room but if you need anything just call, okay?" The conniving bastard couldn't even to pretend to pity me. Ugh, I feel like I belong on a reality show at this point. "Sure." Jesus gave a geniune response but it was faked, who better to tell than a liar himself.

Jesus' laid his head on my shoulder whilst resting his right arm across my chest. For a minute I was confused but I soon realised Jesus and I were both on the same stranded ship. We both longed for companions his most likely being temporary and mine being, god-forbid, permenant.

Jesus brought his face milimeteres away from mine, his warm breathe on my cheekbone scanned towards the bridge of my nose where he planted a kiss. I responded automatically as my hand shot up to the back of his neck, my fingers circled round the back of his neck in motion. Without opening my eyes I brought our lips together, every fibre in my body disperesed energy in order for me to make that the most passionate kiss of my life. For once that void in my heart was filled for a couple of seconds. For once I felt comfortable in my own skin, For once I didn't give a fuck about pleasing society. I was in total bliss.


	6. Lust and Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Expectatiosn rise and standards possibly drop, you tell me.

I woke up for the first time not feeling restless. The last memory I had in reality was the sensual kiss between Jesus and I. I smile to myself swinging my head slowly from right to left, I felt like a winner.   
"Fernando?" The power of vularity clouded my thoughts once again.  
"Fernando, you've become anemic and the lack of blood pumped towards your heart was the reason why you passed out, blood was donated by a friend of yours but you're fine now. As long as you intake the right source of iron and fibre..."   
My attention was lead astray after discovering that Jesus donated his blood to me.  
The doctor left as Jesus walked in. I wanted to stand and move because I literary felt like a slab of meat but Jesus gave me so much attention and care, I was a beg to him because he fed my miniture ego.   
"Look who woke up!" His eyes were like shimmering pools as he smiled at me.  
He sat at the edge of my bed holding my hands, I trembeled in adoration to the heat of his hand against mine.   
"How do you feel?" He observed my face as if I was a Vincent Van Gogh portrait. "Like i've been bitch slapped by life". I laughed. Maybe I was lying, maybe I wasn't. Even I was rendered clueless.  
"I want to get something off my chest" just then I could see Sergio walk up and stand at the entrance of the doorway, with Jesus' back to Sergio, I nodded approvingly for him to continue as I prepared myself to watch Sergio burn. The more hopeless they are, the easier to lure them, I thought, for desires are infinite.  
"I, I don't know where to start but I want to pour out my every desire to you Fernando. He inhaled and shut his eyes. Pretty Odd.   
"Sometimes theres a burning craving that every man in my opinion needs to fulfil. That night I slept by your side, I felt stagnated and overwhelmed with addiction. You were delicate, the longer I starred at you the more deeper I pummelled into desire and lust. Your company is like a sanctuary for me, Fernando." My eyes grew wide as I watched him pour out his heart to me. Hot tears trickled down my cheeks as my face burned.   
"I know I sound a little delerious Fernando but when I met you, I forgot the meaning of lonliness. I'm sorry I can't look at you right now because its going to take every ounce of courage in me to say this. I love you."  
I had never had seen someone so infatuated with me before, it made me feel as if I had a purpose. His eyes were still shut tight, I moved my head towards his and kissed him.   
His kiss felt like sparks in my mouth but then I remebered Sergio, I broke the kiss gently as Jesus bit my bottom lip, I opened my eyes to find Sergio stood still emotionless, he didn't flinch or blink.   
I was in two minds yet again as to which path I should take. Yes my manifestation with Sergio was still as strong as ever but Jesus, Jesus.  
His phone rang and broke me away from my thoughts.  
"I'll be back" he strolled out the room not paying attention to Sergio.  
Goddamn, Sergio looked so fine.  
He began to walk over to me and sit in the same place Jesus rose from. He starred at me with his head tilted slightly like I was a maths equatition.   
I starred back as I admired him like a work of art, I could of admired him all day.   
He grabbed my chin and moved it right then left as his stare intensified. "I don't see it." I wanted to sigh with relief, I thought I was going to be bitch slapped or punched.  
"See what?" I wasn't thick, I knew what he meant, I wanted to render his thought process.  
"What Navas sees in you, you look like the kids in the academy."I wanted to verbally fight with him so it could end in steamy love making but that only ever happens in films so why hope.  
"I'm older than you". I wanted to sarcastically applaud myself. What an argument i've put forward.   
"No shit." He rolled his eyes.  
I felt pathetic infront of Sergio.  
Fernando, I was wondering if pherhaps...I dont know, you and me could um, talk over lunch or something." He looked uneasy, like a high schooler asking out someone way out of his league. But i'd join Sergio's league in a heart beat.  
"Why?" I actually was curious.  
"Because I have questions and you have answers, okay?"   
"Fine. When?" I tried to keep my cool because I could of burst with excitment.  
"Tomorrow at 12, you come to my room and we'll go from there." Hell yeah motherfucker, hell yeah I thought to myself.   
"What room are you in?"   
"49." Sergio looked like he was going to gag at the sight of me.  
He got up and left trying not to power walk. 

I got up and showered, the bedroom was dark and strange. It was only 10am and it seemed as if no one had lived there before. I walked over to my phone because I was clueless as to where the light switch was.   
Then out of they ordinary, Jesus appeared in front of me. His blue eyes shone like alarms.   
He nested his head into my neck as he planted small peaks all around. His petite hands stroked my back sending shivers down my spine. I could hear my heart pumping, pumping my desire for Jesus. "I love you", his words repeated in echos in my head. I was going delerious.

I firmly locked my arms around his spine; skin unifying. He began to kiss lower and lower till he kneeled. I felt like I was sat on a pedestel of gold as I watched him long for me, worshipping me like a god.  
His phallus lips met with my manhood, I felt tender inside his burning mouth, further and further I probed as he rubbed my thighs occasionally whipping me with his bony dwarf-esque fingers.   
Deeper and deeper, I begged to explore his inner being, allowing him to satisfy my pleas.   
The clocks stopped breathing as I reached the end with my head swinging back.  
Jesus turned my pains into pleasures as he absorbed my rain drops.   
My pasty body was overwhelmed with addiction, may it continue forever and evermore.


	7. The One That Got Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fernando takes charge to make certain he doesn't lose Sergio even if he's morally wrong.

11:59. I paced the corridor up and down starring at my watch. There was always something about my customs that has hardly ever caught the eye of any of my team mates. Anxiety; to compensate my uninspiring purpose. Viciously tapping my foot against the floorboard, as my impatients grew while drowning in the ambience of my feelings. At this stage, I was in two minds. Jesus a self-professed lover and Sergio, my purpose to live. Frankly, as far as habits go, I've always been oblivious to mine since birth, till it was Sergio who brought it to my often distracted state of thought.

12:00. I halted and looked up to face the door, Sergio swung open the door and mirrored me. There was an awkward pause.

"Hi....I'm not trying to be rude but you don't look okay?". Sergio was apologetic.

I felt flames in my stomach, I'm not sure why but I could feel anger and resentment. I couldn't move.

Sergio branched his arm towards my neck and pulled me into the room. "Come here, buddy".

He guided me to his bed and sat me at the top of the bed. His portrayal of kindness was new for me, I mean he called me 'buddy'. Wait, have I been friend zoned before becoming the friend?

Sergio looked down into his lap and inhaled, "that day, that day Jesus confessed his love to you it was special Fernando, it was something I've always longed for." His tone took a sharp turn. 

"I've never personally talked to you, you seem so misunderstood and the way the others pick at your quirks in the..."

"They what?" I cut in. I wanted to sob and rant like a child, I was an outcast. All this on-pitch smiling and celebrating was just a show for the spectators. I always knew this but I was never certain. I attempted to gulp my growing pain when Sergio leaned over and hugged me. It was warm and gentle, like the hugs my father would give me when I awoke from nightmares. 

He whispered into my cold ear, "I'm sorry, you didn't deserve that". 

After moments of silence went by and I felt Sergio screw his eyes shut, I wrapped my arms around his warm body. Sergio wasn't going to be the one that got away, I wouldn't let it. 

I sheepishly broke the silence which was a brave act for me. "So why did you want to see me? I mean it's not everyday my team mates ask to see me, well it's never." 

Sergio broke away and met with my eyes, "I wanted your insight on what I started and never finished."

I nodded approvingly in response.

"When Jesus confessed his love to you, It was the most sincere and special thing I'd ever seen. He, he was my first crush, homo crush to clarify and all my crushes last about a week till I sleep with them and realise it was just lust. Jesus confessing his love brought me to come to terms with the fact that I need to think about my life and what I intend to do with it but Fernando, do you really love Jesus?"

I froze, I felt like I was being stifled.   
"Jesus loves me and I just don't feel the same way, he's a great friend, my only friend at this point in time and I just have the same feelings but for someone else", I dropped the hints as subtle as possible.

Sergio's gaze was fixed on me.   
"Why, are you? I, I, .."  
My heart was ecstatic, I was panting, panicking, loosing my senses. I pulled Sergio's face by both hands so our lips met. He asserted his derision that "I let him in". It wasn't long before the two of us were enthralled in lust. Unwrapping ourselves like fast food. 

My morale - begging, furious and grasping my conscious, the power of the devil hissing words in my ear, accepted the sin of lust.   
I climbed down his abs hiding my protruding lips between the silky skin of his thighs. I felt like a young boy with a pit-less wallet in a store full of rich candy. Sergio moaned, his moans spread like an epidemic across the halls and four corners, long and far. I explored his flavours from sugary sweet sin to sour sensation. I wanted to satisfy myself. 

Sergio let out a cry, "Infect me with your love!". His venomous bitter manhood, creamy and aggressive. He roared his moans at this point.   
The sunlight sets in a silent gaze as I pressed deeper and further, into an abyss of copulation. I wouldn't stop, I couldn't, let him be the one that got away

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first piece of work so I felt obliged to write a sernando fanfic as it was the reason why I discovered ao3. Feedback, good or bad is appreciated


End file.
